


Like a Dead Man Walking

by sal_paradise



Category: Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: Collars, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Torture, ash is not a klingon!, dom! Michael i guess, how to not blow your cover and help your captain instead of having sex, lorca is in a bad way, lorca is not a bad guy!, sub! Lorca
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-01-15
Packaged: 2019-03-05 01:56:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13377681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sal_paradise/pseuds/sal_paradise
Summary: post  1 x 10 -With Lorca  at the hands of his torturers How do the Star Fleet team react? does embracing the darker halves  help save their captain? An alternate to a clear bad ending for my poor  captain





	Like a Dead Man Walking

**Author's Note:**

> Gone gone gone spinning slack through the end?  
> Deadens? my brain falling up through the years  
> Till I swivel back round then I fly fly fly  
> Losing breath from the water then I'm gone gone gone  
> And I'm gone  
> And I'm gone, like I'm dancing on angels  
> And I'm gone, through the crack in the past~ Dead Man Walking - David Bowie
> 
> before sunday's episode and have some tortured lorca! and how his team reacts to it.

 

Pain and agony.

It was all Lorca knew.

His voice was raw and horse- practically non existent- he had screamed himself to the point where he had lost it.

It hadn't been enough.

He still felt every wave of pain, he no longer had the strength to pretend he was fine.

 

The pain had stopped as he leaned lifelessly in his glass prison, it was too small for him to curl up into a ball hell- he couldn't even bend down.

 

His nerves were frayed and torn between being pulled taught to the point of snapping and every touch causing him over sensitivity and numbness.

Gently he he tried to provide himself with any comfort he could.No one would do it for him...

What would he expect?He didn't deserve it...Lorca tries to wrap himself up in his own embrace, burrowing into his jacket, hands shaking and jittering.

 

The Terrans had laughed at him as he finally gave away to full blooded screams of agony as wave after wave of pain occurred.

“A chamber fit for a king” they cooed and jabbed at him like he was an animal. He always told himself never to lose track of time when it came to torture where minutes could steretch into hours, hours - days.

Yet. he found himself slipping easily...

It was so much nicer to just let go..

No.

His name was Gabriel Lorca. He was captain of the USS Discovery and former captain of the USS Buran. He had to destroy his own ship to survive that- the Buran was dead and a part of him  went along with it- He was here with Lt. Ash Tyler posing as an imperial guard and Michael Burnam, his specialist  posing as Captain Burnam of this very ship. The ISS Shenzhou which where they were from was long gone.

But not here...

Wherever the hell here was.

He sighed- and he Captain Lorca was a fugitive here, a step up in some people’s eyes but.. He had murdered one of the very people he was sworn to protect.

 

Lorca tried to stand up fully and his vision swam dangerously.

He groaned, clamping his eyes shut. Everything hurt, his eyes felt like he was having ice picks shoved into them repeatedly, his body felt raw.

He needed an out.

He needed..

“Ah look who has rejoined the world of the living.” A voice cruelly cut in.

Lorca froze, straining his damaged eyes to see. His senese were skewed he missed the entrance of three Terran guards.

“Sleep well traitor?”

Lorca was silent, he dropped his gaze...he really didn’t want to-

“Well don't be shy!” one of Terrans exclaimed “ you weren’t shy when you tried to overthrow the Emperor or when you tried to murder our captain! In fact all you should be doing is talking you should be telling us  **all** .  **About** .  **It.** ”

She leaned in dangerously close to the case.

“Well? We’re waiting.”

Lorca tried to respond to this but before he could muster a noise with his fractured voice the box lit up once more and powerful electricity surged through it. His body screamed as pain washed through his veins and muscles anew and he was howling like gutted beast as the guards cackled at his misery.

“What’s that Lorca? We can’t hear you maybe a bit louder?” a guard squealed with glee

“Maybe we should-”

“ENOUGH” a voice boomed out.

The guards suddenly pulled back, the pain disappeared and Lorca couldn't hold himself up anymore as he clasped against the glass, the only thing keeping him on his feet was the confined space.

They pulled back just enough for Lorca to see two figures enter the room- Ash Tyler looking stiff and stoic as a personal guard -his eyes flitted briefly to Lorca and the hard line of his frown became stiffer and Michael Burnham in all her metallic glory waltzed into the room; Like a king, shoulders held tall and straight, gaze cold and hard as diamonds, crimson lips twisted in a sneer he’d never seen on her.

“Does that belong to you?.” she managed

“Captain I-”

“I asked you, does that BELONG TO YOU?” she snarled raising her voice.

The guards cowarded slightly.

“No captain.”

“Then I ask “Who gave you the right to play with what does not belong to you?” 

 

“With all due respect Captain, this traitor tried to hurt the emperor! It’s their right-”

 

“HE BELONGS TO ME!” Burnham spat “ the emperor can do with his scraps what they wish. 

The traitor tried to kill me so he’s my property… In fact.” 

 

She snapped her fingers “release him I have a surprise for him.”

The guards looked on nervously before pressing the release on the agonizer chamber.

Lorca had no strength. The minute the booth was unlocked he fell, unable to brace himself smacking his face hard on the metal ground.

 

“Get him on his knees”

 

Two of the guards pulled Lorca to a sitting position arms tugged behind his back.

“A present for you Captain, you think you’re such a freedom fighter, so for you something to bring you back down to earth.” She smiled down at him, and Lorca couldn't suppress the chill that ran up his spine, her gloved hands caressed his face lifting his chin and gaze to her.

“You’ll learn soon enough where and who you belong to, but first something to remind you.” 

Michael removed from behind her back an object

 

“I found it in my room, it will suit you well.”

Lorca stared, before him what could only be described as as a collar, dangled in her grip, gold and gilded similar to what a earth dog would wear.

 

He froze.Trying to backpedal slightly, he may not know a lot about his other universe counterpart but he was sure about one thing they had in common.

They were nobody’s dog.

 

The guards grip on him tightened, holding him still as Michael bend down and snapped the heavy metal collar into place. It weighed him down, he felt it tighten as Michael adjusted the straps, constricting his breathing slightly. The collar was attached to an equally gaudy gilded leash, firmly wrapped in Michaels hand.

He felt trapped despite who was in control, he swallowed nervously, his breath coming in harsh pants.

“Release him.”

“Captain?”

“It’s alright, he won’t get far. After all, every dog needs to learn his place.”

The guards obeyed her taking a cautious step backwards.

Lorca couldn't help it, sham or not, he was feeling trapped, his hands automatically went to his neck pulling at the collar, at first gently and then more harshly a unwanted whine of despair leaving his lips when it didn’t budge.

He needed to be free.

He needed out- he needed..

 

Michael and Ash watched. She hated what was happening, she had hoped to never see her captain like this, captains were a ship’s rock. Their  foundation. Without them they were all lost. Here was hers, clawing at his own neck with more and more panic, while his crew watched; and it was done by her hand, It was her fault.

 

She sunk her nails into her palm to stop her hand from trembling.

She made eye contact with Tyler, his body was tensed -he was doing the same.

This was wrong but...it needed to be done.

So they could go home.

So he could be their captain again.

She took a deep breath.

“Stop that” she sneered and gave the leash a harsh tug so suddenly that Lorca yipped like a beaten dog, falling back onto his hands and knees.

“Bad boy”

The guards laughed. Lorca didn’t raise his gaze, he was trying to make himself small.

Fat chance.

“Eyes on me Lorca.” again another tug until slowly blue pain filled eyes found hers, the gaze was sluggish, wavering.

“Better” she soothed, her hand carding gently through his hair “you know Gabriel every wild beast can be domesticated, even the most stubborn of us.” she twisted her hand harshly in his hair pulling his head back quickly. 

‘It just takes the right persuasion. Everything has a limit a breaking point. No one here would fault you, you’ve last longer then most in your place.”

Lorca was silent.

“So I ask you, before things get uglier. Will you bow to me?”

The room was silent. All awaiting an answer.

Lorca bared his teeth.

_ They wanted a fight? Fine _

_ “ Will bow to you?  _ **_Will I bow  to you?”_ ** _ he laughed “ _ Fuck you queen bitch” he seethed “ and your little fucking servant too” he spat in Ash’s direction.

MIchael smiled, a huge predator smile in response.

“Good, I’m glad you’re still in the mood to play. So am I.” She leaned in “when I'm done with you you, you'll beg to kiss the ground I stand on...but no matter Gabriel I’ll make you see your favourite position is on your knees” she ran a delicate finger over his torn lip playfully.

He winced.

“As for my little servant.” she snapped her fingers.

Ash came forward.

“You can speak to him now.” Ash hated what he saw, this was not his captain, a man pale, shaking, made property.

Yet in those damaged eyes… he saw it… that fire burning like a forest fire. Wild..savage ...untamed - alive.

 

“How does it feel to bow at the feet of Burnham?” Lorca managed.

Ash was silent.

“No words eh? Maybe you'll have them when she grows tired of you and will use your tongue to-”

The room suddenly resounded with a hard slap of skin on skin.

Lorca flew backwards, scrambling to his knees his lip now clearly split open, a small cut on his hairline sent small lines of hot blood down his face.

 

“Sensitive I see,” Lorca slurred through his injured lip.

“Does it hurt you to know you’re nothing to her, a plaything? When the new and improved version comes along she’ll do to you what she's doing to me. Were nothing to her. You're nothing to her, just something to use and abuse.”

“Shut up.”

“When do you expire?”

“Shut up traitor!” Ash spat he kicked out hard at Lorca’s side and there was an audible crack.

Ash felt himself pale as Lorca cried out and crumpled. The guards cheered. Michael starred as Lorca wavered- trying to get to his knees  before another attack could happen.

“Good boy,” Ash whispered. “Now heel,” before Lorca could get fully up Ash ground his boot heel into his prone hand.

There was a whip crack of a noise.

Lorca’s didn't bother to hold back on his screams as the bones on his hand cracked under pressure. Ash felt nauseous he was sure that would he would lose his composure.Lorca cradled his broken hand to his chest protectively, gasping for breath.

 

He looked wrecked.

Ash hated this. This was not the man who he met who was in control, not the hard edged leader of the USS Discovery. He was slipping hard and fast.

“Enough” Michael’s command boomed.

The room went silent.

“I think Lorca has learned his lesson for now, he needs a break.” 

The guards eyes raises to her, curious.

The cruel smile was back “ Tyler get him on his feet, walk the dog throughout the ship let them see him for what he is and I will find you, when we’re through with him he’ll  be so exhausted he’ll never slept better.”

Ash nodded and tried to gently get Lorca to his feet.

He struggled,  off balance shaking miserably like the beaten dog they were making him. 

 

Slowly Ash marched him down the hallway as the Terrans stared, jeered and poked at him. 

 

Lorca hung his head and averted their gazes as he was paraded down the halls He knew Michael has just saved their rears as they marched through the ship, and she began to bellow orders drawing attention away from the prisoner. Lorca was stumbling now, blind with pain, Ash swiftly marched Lorca all the way to Michael's bed chamber. Pushing him inside quickly.

 

There he let out the breath he'd been holding as Lorca’s body finally gave out on him, his knees buckled and Ash caught him.

Lowering him quickly to the bed.

He sighed. They were safe for now.

Xxx

Michael wasn’t sure what she’d find in her quarters, she managed to escape the bridge briefly,  claiming  she was patrolling the  ship-  she had also in her short time managed to disconnect some of the cameras, so the Terrans couldn’t  follow  her  progress  through the ship- buying any  amount of time she could- she knew it was a risk but she needed to see her  captain… she needed to  know. As she entered her chambers she held her breath, and quickly was met with Ash Tyler sitting up in her bed.

 

He smiled weakly at her, but the quickly faded as he glanced down at his chest. There was Gabriel Lorca, pressed face first into Tyler’s chest,  one arm strung loosely around the lieutenants hips his broken hand tucked to his chest protectively a miserable looking sight if she’d ever seen one . Lorca reminded her in that moment of herself after the loss of her parents… lost in pain but too proud to ask for help, while what they really needed was someone to hold them, to comfort them. Ash was running soothing hands through his hair It was the gentlest she’d ever seen him be.

“How is-”

Ash shook his head “he’s not good Michael. He’s not in good shape at all.” he shifted slightly making Lorca bury deeper. Ash had gotten him out of his bloody jacket and shirt even if he couldn't heal anything, he wanted to relax Lorca any way he could.

“Two broken ribs” he indicated to Lorca’s side, now red and swollen, falling uneasily as he breathed and, his hand is broken. He  dehydrated, over  exhausted  has burns and  damaged muscles from the shocks.” Michael looked at the way Lorca had cradled his injured hand to his chest protectively, it looked slightly deformed, purple and red. Ash looked a little green around the gills as he said this.

“I did that..” he managed “ to my own captain”

“It wasn’t-”

“It was though!” Ash exclaimed “I didn't have to go that far, I didn’t have to make him scream. But I did.- what’s wrong with me?” 

Ash looked at the bundled form of Lorca pressed into chest.He shifted slightly and the smallest of whines emerged from the captain, Ash soothed him again but it was clear he wasn’t with them as the noise turned into soft sobbing. Almost inaudible he was muttering something over and over again. Ash leaned forward.

 

“What is it captain?” he listened as Lorca ranted trapped in his delusions.

Ash looked grim at his words.

“What did he say?” Burnham questioned.

Ash shook his head ‘he said he deserved this”

Michael closed her eyes. Her heart thudding in her chest. She couldn’t do this, she couldn’t see him like this. He didn’t deserve this.

Ash ran soothing circles on his back.He seemed to be coming to slowly, disoriented unsure where he was, he was coming out swinging…He must have sensed something was wrong as he jerked back from Ash, pupils blown wide in surprise, good hand clenched in a fist ready to fight.

 

“Captain?” Ash managed “it’s me, Tyler- and Burnham, she’s here too.” he placed a gentle hand on him trying to ground him. He looked at Ash’s hand like it was foreign to him. Slowly Ash brought a hand to his undamaged cheek.the older man  closed his eyes with a small sigh  and leaned greedily into him.

MIchael approached “Captain?”

“B-burnham?” he managed.

“His voice was a hoarse whisper hardly there.“D-did we?”

Michael shook her head “ Not yet sir. This may take longer than we thought.”

She noticed how dejected he looked, he was tired, injured, but he didn’t say anything more.

“W-where am I?”

“I brought us some time sir, you’re in my quarters.” Slowly, carefully she moved her hand to his, lacing her fingers with her Captains. She was surprised when he returned the gesture weakly.

“I-I can’t” he tried to push away from Ash suddenly “before they n-notice.” He trembled with the effort and collapsed pitifully against Tyler panting with the effort, sweating.

 

“Captain please, just take this time to rest. I don’t know if I’ll be able to buy us some time again. Just-” she couldn’t  finish her sentence, his pain glazed eyes  fixed on hers cutting her off.

 

“-I can't. Don't you see?” he managed “I’m the captain it’s my job to make sure you make it through this- I lead you follow”

His words were stiff  fully of authority- despite his state.

 

“ How do you feel?” Ash ventured

 

Lorca was quiet “I  won’t lie Tyler… I’m not a young man anymore, I don’t know how much I can take-” Lorca broke off in a harsh cough that came away with a bloody hand, and Lorca clutching onto Ash harder, till the lieutenant returned to soothing his shattered form.

 

Ash and Burnham felt panic trill through them - to see Lorca admit  to pain… It wasn’t a good sign.

“I don't blame you for what’s happened to me- I deserve worse.”

“Captain-”

“I’m not a good man Michael Burnham… I’ve made mistakes, I’ve lost the lives of good men and women. I-I think it’s time for some payback.” He winced as Tyler shifted him up into a sitting position .

Tyler frowned.

“Tyler I can see how your mind works...d-don’t beat yourself up that’s an order. You are doing  what you do best, survive. You’re a survivor.” Ash avoided his captains gaze until he couldn’t any longer, tired blue eyes bored into him “ you  get yourself and Burnham out if this doesn’t work out.”

“Sir-” they managed in unison.

Ash didn't  want to think of this, he had just found someone who he could  devote himself to- and now it was on verge of slipping from his fingers. He wrapped himself tighter into Lorca’s side nhis other hand  finding Burnham’s as if he could protect them- from all harm.

_ He couldn’t- he wouldn’t- _

“I need you both to be brave- to keep going. Don't worry about me. You’re Starfleet; you do what's right for others. We protect those in need.  You do what  we have to- right now, we need to get home, help people there.”

 

“But what about your needs?” pleaded Burnham “you’re our captain. We serve by you.” Lorca chuckled- they both winced, his laugh was high and wheezing and strained-  weakly his gaze remained holding hers

“They’ll be others to take my place. Don’t you worry.” He squeezed her hand gently.

Burnham shared a grim glance  with Tyler.

“You two look like you’re at my  funeral  already.” he  managed with a crooked smile “ I’m not dead yet. I’m not one for faith but, but a little couldn’t hurt us, and always remember the context of the situation we’re in.”

“ Yes sir.” they replied.

“ How much time do I have Burnham?” Lorca managed tiredly.

“About  four hours till they really notice you’re gone sir.  Get some rest please.”

Ash didn’t  wait for a reply he tugged Lorca back into the warmth of his touch, holding him deeply, burying Lorca into the crook of his neck for mutual comfort.

“We’ll make it through this, even if it’s kicking and screaming” Burnham managed.

Ash nodded trying to muster more confidence then he felt “we’ll make it through.. All of us,  even if it’s dragging ourselves on our hands  and knees.” He gave Burnham a wolfish smile  despite everything  we’ll make it through like  dead  men walking.”

Burnham returned the grin “like dead men walking.” Her hand rested on Lorca’s  good hand, adding more protection to him, more comfort, more strength, to her companions  as they drifted off to sleep.

They would make it. They had to.

**Author's Note:**

> have an idea? hit me up on tumblr life-on-the-geek-side


End file.
